Reckless (Part Fifteen)

AMELIA


the dinner went pretty smoothly. in retrospect, somethings could have gone better, but everyone enjoyed themselves in some way or another.
the prep was all done, i had even arranged all the raw materials in clear glass bowls like they do on the cooking channel i so loved to watch. at ten to seven, joanne and maria turned up- maria was driving, so i swiftly delievered a white wine to joanne and a lemonade to maria, and they took their seats at the counter where we would be eating. i felt so grown up. i had a plate of chips and crackers with some hummus in the middle for them to snack on while i cooked. i sipped my own glass of wine and the doorbell rang again, this time presenting me dawn and sally. the had brought with them a bottle of sparkling grape juice, and took their seats also.
at quarter past seven, claire and her son turned up.
i gasped. i hadnt expected him to look anything like jack. but there he stood, brown hair, brown eyes, tall, gangly, and even dressed the same. luckily, while i gawked at this jack-clone, claire was jabbering away about being late. i ushered them inside.
"...and of course Will decides he doesnt want to come. damn near had a tantrum as i threatened to drag him here by his ear. he can sit somewhere else while we catch up cant he?" she almost pleaded with me. i felt sorry for him instantly. i poured claire a wine and got will a glass of coke and settled him in the living room.
"Will is it? short for anything?"
he seemed shocked i was talking to him as we meandered down the hall. "william, like my dads middle name. im sorry to ruin your night. mum doesnt trust me much."
"how old are you will?"
"me? eighteen."
"i had a son your age. died not long ago, and you look so much like him."
"oh im so sorry! i didnt know."
"of course you didnt. but i noticed your mother is a bit hard on you. if you ever need to talk to anyone, or a place to stay, well, you know where i am. now, heres the remote for the tv, and this one is for the satellite. ill bring you your food when its ready. i take it youll eat a bucketload?"
he grinned. "thanks amelia. for everything."

the rest of the evening went smoothly. i joined the gossip in the kitchen as i cooked- multitasking! i should have taken a picture to prove it to kat!- and took most of it through to will. everyone ate all of it and i glowed with pride. we had dessert and then coffee too, and it was nearly midnight before everyone left. on his way out the door i gave will a piece of paper with my number and address on it and bid them all a safe trip home.
once the door was closed and locked, i looked at the kitchen in dismay. i may have been multi tasking, but that had lead to a huge mess being created. i shrugged and decided to leave it til morning. i had done well and needed a sleep. the wine wasnt helping, i was feeling a tiny bit tipsy and smiled to myself as i knew it would help me drift off to sleep that much better.

i slept in the next morning, and was woken by the sun in my window. i got up slowly, showering and dressing before plodding downstairs to deal with the disaster kitchen.
it wasnt that bad, but it took me a good half hour to get it back to its original state. while i was washing, i remembered fondly the time kat and jack had tried making me a birthday dinner and had ended in a foof fight. that had taken hours to clean, with pasta sticking to every surface and the cream sauce coating every surface. i smiled at the memory, and stored it away for future reference.

i spent the rest of the day sorting through the garage and finding some paintings i might like to offer for selling. i brought them up into the house, and took some others back down in their place. they were stacked neatly accodring to size, and by the end of the day i was tired again. i dressed in sweats and curled up on the sofa, watching a trashy movie and doodling absentmindedly until i headed upstairs for bed.

the next day i continued with my sorting and found a huge stash of old jewellery i had made and put it in piles by what it was and what would sell. i kept a few pieces for me too.
when the knock on the door came, i jumped. i wasnt expecting anyone, and i hoped it wasnt kats parents. i wasnt sure how they would react when i told them i had let her go on a road trip without their consent and without me. so i was nervous when i opened the door, and completely shocked to see will standing there.
"hey amelia, im real sorry, do you mind if i stay here for a little bit? my parents are throwing a fit and i cant hack it there right now. you can tell me to leave if you-"
"nonsense. come in. do you want anything to eat or drink? i have some lasagne i can heat up if you want?"
"no, im ok for now, thanks though." he stood in the middle of the room, looking lost and confused. i felt so bad for him, i crossed the room and hugged him- quickly, but gently. he looked even more confused after that, but softened, probably at the though of my dead son. i told him to take a seat at the counter and busied myself with making coffee while i waited for him to talk. i had had enough experience with troubled teenagers to know that generally its best not to pry and wait for them to open up to you. i fished some chocolate biscuits from the pantry and laid it on a platter- coffee, milk, sugar and cookies. i was becoming quite the martha stewart i thought to myself. i settled myself next to him and filled a cup with coffee and milk and sugar and began the dunking process.
"my mother would tell me not to play with my food if i were doing that."
i smiled. "im not the average mother. lions get to chase their food before they eat it, why cant i?"
he relaxed at that. "they dont understand that its not me. my friends arent really the best group, and they make me do stupid stuff, stay out late, smoke, tease the other kids. i hate doing it, but i hate the idea of not having friends as well. dad just get angry. i hate being there all the time."
i could tell this was a huge weight off his shoulders. he had no one he could talk to about this. he poured himself a coffee and grabbed a handful of biscuits. i picked up my cup. "come sit in the lounge. i can bore you with pictures of jack and kat growing up."
we sat in the living room, and i told him all about jack and his father, and how jack had met kat.
"wow," he said when he saw kat. "shes really pretty. is she.... with jack?"
i knew what he meant by that. "no, she lives. shes gone on a road trip actually, a huge step for her. especially without jack. i wonder how shes getting on..."
we flicked through the pages of the photo album, telling him all the details about their life.

i heard a car outside, but figured it was the neighbours. it wasnt until the front door opened that i realised it was someone else. two seconds later, kat walked in and i gasped.
she looked so different. her hair was shorter, but not by much- if it wasnt so smooth i wouldnt have noticed. she was wearing makeup, and completely different clothes. she looked like a different person, but still very kat. her light blue eyes shone next to her light blue tank top. then her eyes fell on will, still looking at the photos, but glanced up at kat when i gasped.
"kat! youre home early!" and i jumped up and hugged her. i hadnt realised how much i had missed her until she stood before me. i held her back at arms length to look at her. "youve changed! you look so beautiful oh my god!"
"youre shocked. is it too weird?"
i could tell she was nervous, possibly because of the jack look-alike sitting here with me.
"not weird at all. where are my manners? kat, this is will, hes a friend of a friend. will, this is kat."
"you say that like he knows who i am," kate said, her eyes on her shoes. her voice was quiet and i knew she wanted to get out of this situation as soon as she could.
"amelia was just showing me some photos and i recognized you when you walked in." he walked around and stood by us, and shook kats hand with a sobre look on his face. "shall i leave you two alone for a minute? you must have gossip to catch up on. another coffee anyone?"
god, he was such a gentleman.
"two more please will, thankyou." i turned to kat once he had left and ushered her to the couch.
"amelia! who is he? if youre trying to find me a replacement jack, well you should know me a bit better by-"
"shush, no hes a girl from works son, and he gets into a bit of trouble, more misunderstandings really. he wanted to talk to someone and he turned up here. its just a coincidence he looks like jack. please dont run away?"
"ill stay and talk. nothing embarrassing please."
"yay! now, tell me about your very sucessful i see, shopping trip?"
"later, here he comes."
and will walked in, and his eyes automatically sought out kat and smiled at her like i was invisible. uh oh.



KAT

as it turned out, will was lovely. he was polite enough to know when i wanted to talk to amelia and made us coffees while she debriefed me. i did enjoy seeing their jaws drop when i walked in though, that was fun.
for about an hour we sat on the couch going through the phot albums amelia had, drinking too much coffee and remembering old stores will wasnt there for.
"i really must get going amelia, thank you so much. for everything."
"thats really not a problem will, youre welcome any time."
i blushed for no reason.
"goodbye, kat, it was really good to meet you." the way he looked at my face made me turn redder and i glared at my shoes again. he was rather old fashioned.

amelia and i sat in the kitchen later, waiting for our pre-packaged meals to cook in the microwave.
"will couldnt stop looking at you."
"what? he probably thought i just looked weird or different from all those humiliating pictures you showed him."
"and the reason he was sitting so close on the couch to you?"
"because you were taking up so much room? i dont know, but im not even slightly interested and i dont care. he is a nice person, but he is your friend not mine."
"ok. anyway, tell me all about this trip of yours. why the make over?"
"well, i was driving and driving- i got really good at it you know- and i decided to visit the colleges i had been accepted into. and i narrowed it down to two."
"which two?"
when i told her the universities, her eyes brimmed up with pride. "oh kat, im so proud of you. i honestly didnt think you would do anything ever again because of... because of jack being gone."
well, i hadnt either. but after so many journal entries of him being in love with me and in love with the fact i was alive, i couldnt deny him that. he fought so hard to keep me here, so hard to make me happy, and was, until he died. but i wanted jack to see me. i wanted to prove to him i could be happy, and even though i couldnt do it while he was alive, i was still going to do it for him.